Let me first begin by saying I am in no way a scientist or a professional by any means, nor have any proof of the things I am saying. I have commented on what I have read or seen when applicable. These are merely ponderances I have made recently from various new informations I have received and am considering.
At psychcentral.com there is a test that anyone can take to evaluate whether or not they may be schizophrenic or have schizophreniform~type disorders. The questions are as follows.
I feel that others control what I think and feel.
I hear or see things that others do not see.
I feel it is very difficult for me to express myself in words that others can understand.
I feel I share absolutely nothing in common with others, including my friends and family.
I believe in more than one thing about reality and the world around me that nobody else seems to believe in.
Others don’t believe me when I tell them the things I see and hear.
I can’t trust what I’m thinking because I don’t know if it’s real or not.
I have magical powers that nobody else has or can explain.
Others are plotting to get me.
I find it difficult to get ahold of my thoughts.
I am treated unfairly because others are jealous of my special abilities.
I talk to another person or other people inside my head that nobody else can hear.
I took this test, and this was my score.
” 31. Based upon your responses to this schizophrenia screening measure, you appear to have some signs commonly associated with schizophrenia or a schizophrenia-related disorder. Your responses are similar to others who experience symptoms of schizophrenia or a schizophrenia-related disorder. This includes symptoms such as hallucinations and/or delusions, a poverty of speech, and/or emotional “flattening.” ”
Obviously I don’t have a poverty of speech, and I don’t suffer from any delusions that others control me, are plotting to get me or treat me unfairly, but as for the rest I can definitely be classified as closely associated with the disease.
My mother suffers from disassociative disorder, which was better~known back in the day as multiple personality, a schizophreniform disorder. She has four personalities that I have witnessed. I grew up in a world where demons were outside waiting to get in and evil lurked around every corner. Through her, God ruled with an iron fist, isolating us from the rest of the world.
I have quite a bit of insight into what it’s like to be mentally ill. I suffered with bipolar disorder with schizophrenic tendencies many years of my life, bouncing from one medication to the other. I was never irreversibly ill, but doctors believed I was. As a child, I thought that aliens were waiting in a space ship above me in the sky (which was actually a star), to take me away. They spoke to me through music I listened to (don’t laugh, it was Billy Idol’s “Whiplash Smile”), and told me exactly how to act and what to say to be good enough for them. I kept a diary specifically for their instructions.
Later in life I experienced paranoia, such as video cameras put in certain places to watch me. Still to this day I sometimes have fleeting thoughts about being watched, or that there are video cameras around, but it no longer controls me or affects my life. During my most depressive era I had an infestation of leprechauns that lived in a certain coffee table. My sisters experienced them as well. They would make things disappear. I remember having burned the table, but my sister recently told me that she still has the table but has no further problems with leprechauns.
I would hear voices that would try, gently and lovingly, to make me realize that everyone I loved would be much better off if I were dead. I would have visions of sacrificing myself to giant insect creatures who awaited with bloody mandibles. I sought to silence the voices and visions with drugs and alcohol.
Today, thanks to a lot of work and guidance I am as ‘normal’ as anyone else; free of medication, drugs and alcohol. What was diagnosed as sickness has now become strength, and permanent, disabling depression and neuroses have disappeared forever. I look back and see that much of what was misdiagnosed as brain dysfunction was, in fact, situational, requiring twenty years of self-psychotherapy to cure.
Some might look at the ‘kooky’ claims I make on this website and think I’m still crazy, but one thing I do know is that I am living my dreams in every way, a heaven on Earth that few people believe is possible. I’m successful and happy, surrounded by those who love me and whom I love. My beliefs have worked for me.
My family still suffers, though my siblings are curing themselves in leaps and bounds. There is ADD/ADHD, Alice In Wonderland syndrome, Depersonalization/Derealization disorders and others evident in my family.
In fact, I cannot think of one person on either side of my family tree that is ‘normal’. One might hear all this and think my family is cursed with mental illness. Disorders such as ADD and ADHD may be associated with brain dysfunction, but much that my family experiences seems like a matter of dimensions to me, and this is the basis of the proposal.
I have read and heard of theories suggesting that schizophrenics live in in many dimensions at once, unable to exist solely in this dimension without being aware of the others. I watched the movie Consciousness Mechanics (posted on this website), in which it describes spacelines v/s timelines; spacelines being the minute differences between dimensions here on Earth, in moments that change with the choices we make, such taking a car ride instead of walking.
The increasing number of diagnoses, such as this Alice In Wonderland syndrome and Depersonalization, have the exact same semantics as spiritual practice, and yet people are perceiving these states of mind to be detrimental. My daughter suffers from Depersonalization, which she explains as looking in the mirror and not recognising her body. Alice In Wonderland syndrome is experienced by my little sister, who feels that certain parts of her body are suddenly larger than the universe. I am beginning to believe that people are mistaking possible incredible cosmic experiences with a mental disorder, due to lack of information, fear of the unknown and the world’s increasing dependence on medications and cures for anything that seems abnormal.
Let me begin with my definition of dimensions of perception on Earth as opposed to actual, parallel dimensions to the one we currently exist in on this Earth.
Let us say that I found out some good news that causes me to feel elation, something I perceive will make my life much easier in days to come, such as an inheritance left to me due to a distant relative’s death. Suddenly the world seems boundless and possibilities endless. Walking down the street I will notice that people seem happy and carefree. The sky is more blue than usual, the sun warm and inviting. Doors will be opened for me and opportunities will present themselves that may have not been available on an average day. Every human on Earth can attest to this, we’ve all experienced such days.
Are people really walking around just as they are, with my perception as what has changed? Am I literally witnessing smiles on the faces of people who are actually frowning, or those with neutral expressions? The answer is no. I can look at a person and see their teeth as they smile. I can experience what is happening in real time, just as it is taking place.
Let’s say that another person walking down the same street has been devastated by the death of a close loved one. Does he or she experience carefree, smiling people everywhere? Is the sky so blue, the sun so warm and inviting? That person may feel a cold wind or the sun may seem to glare blindingly into their eyes. People will seem solemn, rushed, unfriendly, and all sorts of unsatisfactory occurrences will happen to them that may have not happened on an average day.
Which experience is real? Both are happening simultaneously, at the same point in space/time. It’s the same street, the same people. It seems to me that both people are experiencing actual reality as it is experienced by the individual. Would it not be said that these two people are living in different spacial dimensions?
The difference between dimensions is just that, difference. Each time I choose to go left instead of right I am changing my reality. Each time I choose a good mood over a bad one I am changing my reality. The hypotheses on dimensions are that we are simultaneously living in many dimensions at once, but are only aware of the current dimension due to the focus of our consciousness. But it seems that dimensions break down further, moment by moment based on the choices we make which are not only altering our current dimension but creating more subtle, wavelike dimensions within the current dimension we are focused on.
In relation to people with schizophrenia and schizophreniform disorders, what is really going on? On the website livingwithschizophreniauk.org, it notes that people born deaf who develop schizophrenia hear voices. How could this be, having never heard a voice before in their lives? Additionally, schizophrenics hear voices of loved one that have passed away. This is a documented experience of those who leave their bodies and travel to different dimensions. However, there are things about the voices schizophrenics hear that do not sound to me like dimensional experiences rather than the voice of the twisted ego, so there is much to consider before making any sort of hypothesis or claim.
What if, as some theories suggest, people with schizophrenic/ schizophreniform disorders are literally unable to focus solely on this current Earth dimension? To them, reality would constantly change, while to us it seems to stay the ‘same’, whatever dimension of perception we are existing within at the time. Therefore, an unexpected shift in attitude or personality would be perceived to us as abnormal when, in fact, they were responding appropriately to what they perceive around them.
As with the voice that tried to convince me I’d be better off dead, I doubt that anyone in an alternate dimension is attempting to convince my other~dimensional self to die. This sounds more like the perception that one has based on feelings about themselves. We don’t yet know how profound an impact belief has upon influencing the thoughts of the believer, but quantum biochemistry is working to explain the effects of thought on man and the world around us.
Most of the voices schizophrenics hear are telling them harmful or hurtful things, but this is not always true. This is one major strike against these disorders as multi~dimensional experiences in my mind, because I don’t believe that “ill” people are all from some dimension where they are being manipulated and abused by others.
I’ve recently gone online to find schizophrenic people that are talking about their experiences, to differentiate what could be ego or brain atrophy from anything that could be described as dimensional experience.
In one conversation, a person explained that they not only broadcast their thoughts but also transmit thoughts. They are aware that others can hear their thoughts, and that they can hear others thoughts. They not only believe others can feel their emotions but that they can feel others emotions. The purpose of the blog was to assuage those like him/her not to think about it and use techniques such as meditation and relaxation to combat the paranoia and confusion that comes along with the symptoms, as well as learning self-love and acceptance.
The science of thought as a vibrational frequency assures us that our thoughts are, in fact, broadcast in the form of vibrations, perhaps not actual words but the emotion behind them. Telepathy is a documented ability that some people have. Emotional states are also vibrations, which can be felt by ’empaths’, which I myself have been since I was a child. What causes these ‘symptoms’ to be considered detrimental?
This person speaks of having the gift to manipulate and ‘mentally torture’ people, and his/her ability to exist in negative states quite well. Has our condemnation of people with abilities, as well as our diagnoses of them as ‘abnormal’ and ‘sick’, caused what would possibly have been a positive, powerful experience to become twisted and malevolent? If everyone around this person would have been supportive and understanding, would his/her experience been entirely different, and the hallucinations positive instead of negative? Many native peoples and tribes around the world embrace hallucinations, visions and voices, and take in those who are experiencing these things, nurturing and harboring them until the experience passes. Many of these people turn out to be shamans, who go on to heal others when their time in the ‘spirit world’ is done.
Another blog was two people talking about how their religious hallucinations made them want to be more religious, to judge less, to go to church more and to pray for pedophiles, in particular. My own experience with a ‘religious’ hallucination, in which “god” came to me in the sunlight (I was an atheist until that moment), changed my life in every way. Could these experiences be not hallucinations but actual ‘religious’ experiences?
One blogger spoke of invisible creatures that observed them at all times, watching, listening and mind reading. This person didn’t feel like the creatures were out to harm them, but was asking others if anyone could explain. Could this person be aware of spiritual guides surrounding him or her?
These are questions that should eventually be answered.
Reading these online community comments has caused a deep grief to well inside me. These people are isolated, tortured and helpless, reaching out to a world that has no answers, only fear. They are doped up with powerful sedatives which further complicate the process of self~discovery and self~psychotherapy. Without the stigma of sickness and the fear that accompanies misunderstanding, our ‘mentally ill’ members of the human family might be our most powerful members.
Could soul travel be the answer? Would the scientific community give more credence to dimensional travel if it meant somehow meeting these people dimension by dimension and helping them work through their confusion? These thoughts are in the infant stage, nowhere near valid enough to claim. However, I want to know more.